Oh man! I am so sorry you are going through this. Health insurance is such a racket. I am grateful to have it, and bitterly angry about how people have to, during the worst times of their lives, deal with physical loss, emotional loss and financial loss and threat. I wish you peace and good health. Love, Virg
"The whole wound includes the part where you find out the wronging comes with a fight. The fight does not ask if you want it. The fight does not ask if you are ready. The fight does not ask if the recovery is done." What you say here is so true, Alex. The incident is what we think is where the real hurt happens. But in reality, the real hurt is when you have to fight for what you need and deserve after the incident.
Looking forward to Part 3, and you deserve the best.
I’ve been thinking of you, and wondering how you were doing.
Wrongful injury is terrible.
I attempted to sue for malpractice after the iatrogenic damage to my spine that I’ve been dealing with for six years. The insurance has covered my surgeries, and some of the medicine, all of the travel costs to and from each surgical specialist have been out of my pocket. The atty I had was highly respected. He simply couldn’t find an MD who would say it was malpractice, but everyone agreed it was. The loss I’ve incurred from my retirement and my current forced early retirement is “unfortunate” according to the legal world.
My heart goes out to you for all the medical bills. I had a different issue 30+ years ago. It was equally soul sucking.
Bankruptcy is an okay thing to declare. And? After ten years of non payment, all the bills disappear off your credit report. It feels awful, it’s terrible to live thru, for years you will filter all your calls from the debt collectors, but eventually it stops, and your credit score returns.
Ease your heart knowing that eventually you won’t have to speak with the atty any more. Let him fight as much as he wants, he’s the one who won’t be paid, because no one can get blood from a stone (that was my daily reminder for ten years back in the early nineties.
Some folks use bankruptcy attys. Some don’t.
Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. No one can make you be anyone other than yourself.
Alex, the medical industrial complex, linked with the effing “insurance” fraud that daily screws consumers/clients/patients or whatever is the nomenclature of the year, sucks. I’m sorry you are caught up in the clutches of this broken system. Not only that lawyers that help themselves to large chunks of their clients cash are part of this broken system too.
I have been through this “legal” process twice in my life, however a zillion miles from what you have suffered with. I hope your lawyer is the “right” one to fit with you and your circumstances. I have found that to be the key to unlocking what you should receive in total, compared to what the party and the insurance people who has changed your life is offering. Seeing you in photos while you were hospitalized broke my heart. Reading what was done to you from the accident and afterward further destroyed me emotionally. I still see you suffering and sadly will continue to suffer for the rest of your life. There is no amount to make up for this, but there is an amount to ease your daily suffering that will never change through no fault of yours. They absolutely owe you for what their client cost you. I sincerely hope your attorney has your back and is willing to fight for you with all he/she possesses. I will keep hoping and praying your will be treated with the respect you deserve and this fight for your life will come through in every aspect that eases some of your daily suffering. 🙏🏻❤️🌹🙏🏻 PS despite all the pain and anguish upon you, your determination to live your life with aliveness never ceases to amaze me. You deserve an abundance of credit for how far you have accomplished in mind and spirit.
"Life" may not be what is happening to you. Life is you finding your way to your mat, making bread, writing. In those small actions, you are responding to what you know to be TRUE even amid the blare of worldly disbelief. That fucking INSULTING bullshit reaction from the big noisy machine is a form of death inducement: "give up, so we profit." You're not having it. In simply noticing the dogs, you're sipping the cup of holy water, perhaps without realizing it, in order not to succumb to the riptide. Keep living that intuitively focused life, Alex. Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit a more serene-looking sofa, and know what the current sofa really is: a sturdy raft, one as absurd-looking as it ought to be under the circumstances.
Alex, I was thinking of you yesterday and realized we hadn't heard from you in a while. Then I get your essay today. I feel everything you wrote here, and how I wish you didn't have to go through any of this - I wouldn't want anyone to go through this!
The way in which you wrote about the legal system, how unfair it is, how you personally are affected by it, how you didn't choose what got you here - I hear that. I feel it. The ache is in me, too, dealing with the healthcare system.
I wish so much systems could be changed.
But, like you said, what is the thing that anchors us in the moment? The kundalini, the bread.
That is what we have.
So glad you are here, Alex. Sending you a virtual hug.
Alex, this is so rotten. As if the accident wasn't enough. I'm shocked and so sorry this is happening to you. And what you write about the fight not having all of you, all of your day or your life, is brave and clear and true. I hope that gradually these free parts will expand and grow and blossom.
I wish there was something I could say and this just angers and saddens me. So many of us have to fight beyond our brain injuries. How an insurance company can say we don’t believe you or you are healed is insane because they know there is no healing from one. Adapting yes, healing no. I just want to hug you. 🩵
I'm not one of those people who say it's all good. Clearly it is not. Sometimes you just have to eat the shit sandwich. In order to cope, I project forward when this will all be behind me, because everything is temporary. Everything passes. Hang in there, Dr. A.
Oh man! I am so sorry you are going through this. Health insurance is such a racket. I am grateful to have it, and bitterly angry about how people have to, during the worst times of their lives, deal with physical loss, emotional loss and financial loss and threat. I wish you peace and good health. Love, Virg
"The whole wound includes the part where you find out the wronging comes with a fight. The fight does not ask if you want it. The fight does not ask if you are ready. The fight does not ask if the recovery is done." What you say here is so true, Alex. The incident is what we think is where the real hurt happens. But in reality, the real hurt is when you have to fight for what you need and deserve after the incident.
Looking forward to Part 3, and you deserve the best.
I’ve been thinking of you, and wondering how you were doing.
Wrongful injury is terrible.
I attempted to sue for malpractice after the iatrogenic damage to my spine that I’ve been dealing with for six years. The insurance has covered my surgeries, and some of the medicine, all of the travel costs to and from each surgical specialist have been out of my pocket. The atty I had was highly respected. He simply couldn’t find an MD who would say it was malpractice, but everyone agreed it was. The loss I’ve incurred from my retirement and my current forced early retirement is “unfortunate” according to the legal world.
My heart goes out to you for all the medical bills. I had a different issue 30+ years ago. It was equally soul sucking.
Bankruptcy is an okay thing to declare. And? After ten years of non payment, all the bills disappear off your credit report. It feels awful, it’s terrible to live thru, for years you will filter all your calls from the debt collectors, but eventually it stops, and your credit score returns.
Ease your heart knowing that eventually you won’t have to speak with the atty any more. Let him fight as much as he wants, he’s the one who won’t be paid, because no one can get blood from a stone (that was my daily reminder for ten years back in the early nineties.
Some folks use bankruptcy attys. Some don’t.
Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. No one can make you be anyone other than yourself.
Alex, the medical industrial complex, linked with the effing “insurance” fraud that daily screws consumers/clients/patients or whatever is the nomenclature of the year, sucks. I’m sorry you are caught up in the clutches of this broken system. Not only that lawyers that help themselves to large chunks of their clients cash are part of this broken system too.
I have been through this “legal” process twice in my life, however a zillion miles from what you have suffered with. I hope your lawyer is the “right” one to fit with you and your circumstances. I have found that to be the key to unlocking what you should receive in total, compared to what the party and the insurance people who has changed your life is offering. Seeing you in photos while you were hospitalized broke my heart. Reading what was done to you from the accident and afterward further destroyed me emotionally. I still see you suffering and sadly will continue to suffer for the rest of your life. There is no amount to make up for this, but there is an amount to ease your daily suffering that will never change through no fault of yours. They absolutely owe you for what their client cost you. I sincerely hope your attorney has your back and is willing to fight for you with all he/she possesses. I will keep hoping and praying your will be treated with the respect you deserve and this fight for your life will come through in every aspect that eases some of your daily suffering. 🙏🏻❤️🌹🙏🏻 PS despite all the pain and anguish upon you, your determination to live your life with aliveness never ceases to amaze me. You deserve an abundance of credit for how far you have accomplished in mind and spirit.
"Life" may not be what is happening to you. Life is you finding your way to your mat, making bread, writing. In those small actions, you are responding to what you know to be TRUE even amid the blare of worldly disbelief. That fucking INSULTING bullshit reaction from the big noisy machine is a form of death inducement: "give up, so we profit." You're not having it. In simply noticing the dogs, you're sipping the cup of holy water, perhaps without realizing it, in order not to succumb to the riptide. Keep living that intuitively focused life, Alex. Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit a more serene-looking sofa, and know what the current sofa really is: a sturdy raft, one as absurd-looking as it ought to be under the circumstances.
Alex, I was thinking of you yesterday and realized we hadn't heard from you in a while. Then I get your essay today. I feel everything you wrote here, and how I wish you didn't have to go through any of this - I wouldn't want anyone to go through this!
The way in which you wrote about the legal system, how unfair it is, how you personally are affected by it, how you didn't choose what got you here - I hear that. I feel it. The ache is in me, too, dealing with the healthcare system.
I wish so much systems could be changed.
But, like you said, what is the thing that anchors us in the moment? The kundalini, the bread.
That is what we have.
So glad you are here, Alex. Sending you a virtual hug.
Alex, this is so rotten. As if the accident wasn't enough. I'm shocked and so sorry this is happening to you. And what you write about the fight not having all of you, all of your day or your life, is brave and clear and true. I hope that gradually these free parts will expand and grow and blossom.
I wish there was something I could say and this just angers and saddens me. So many of us have to fight beyond our brain injuries. How an insurance company can say we don’t believe you or you are healed is insane because they know there is no healing from one. Adapting yes, healing no. I just want to hug you. 🩵
I’m so sorry, I’m sorry you need to deal with this. It’s very unfair. Sending you loads of love
I'm not one of those people who say it's all good. Clearly it is not. Sometimes you just have to eat the shit sandwich. In order to cope, I project forward when this will all be behind me, because everything is temporary. Everything passes. Hang in there, Dr. A.
Oh my Alex. I'm wrapping you in a warm blanket of love. ❤️